ok, I am becoming aware…
Lets see, focusing on emotions:
I will first tackle anger…
A) When I feel angry I immediately feel stressed. I can feel my heart rte
increase and my blood pressure raise.
B) (PAST) I can’t deal with this, I need a smoke
B1) (PRESENT) I can deal with this, what I need to do is;
a)walk away until I am calm then come back to discuss it
b) stop, take three deep breaths,then handle the situation
c) drop everything, rush to the store and buy a pack of cigarettes
C) (PAST) go in the garage away from everyone and have a smoke
C1) PRESENT
I would choose A if I was so angry that I felt I would say things that I
would regret or did not mean.
I would choose B if I feel stressed because of the situation, meaning I can
deal with it, if I can get past my initial irritable response. (I feel like I
am PMSing all month!)
How is that yall??
Kelley
May 5th, 2003 at 3:19 am
Kelley,
This is great. As a ‘generic’ anger ABC it covers the bases nicely. The
only problem you may have is just as you said…”if I can get past my
initial irritable response.” That’s usually the problem we encounter, that
we respond too quickly and by the time we bring in our ABC, the shit has
already hit the fan. That sort of thing is going to happen, we can’t avoid
it. In the mean time, try to look ahead to some event you know is coming
up i.e. some one coming home and they are already late, some relative or
work associate who ‘always’ sets you off. That way you can use your anger
ABC before you do the automatic response. It takes time and practice till
we don’t feel as though we’re always a step or two behind what’s happening.
As for the month long PMSing, how long quit are you? This emotional
chaos, specially the ‘out of proportion’ anger/rage is one of the
characteristics of the first couple of months.
Steve
At 07:08 PM 11/26/01 -0700, Kelley wrote:
Lets see, focusing on emotions:
I will first tackle anger…
A) When I feel angry I immediately feel stressed. I can feel my heart rte
increase and my blood pressure raise.
B) (PAST) I can’t deal with this, I need a smoke
B1) (PRESENT) I can deal with this, what I need to do is;
a)walk away until I am calm then come back to discuss it
b) stop, take three deep breaths,then handle the situation
c) drop everything, rush to the store and buy a pack of cigarettes
C) (PAST) go in the garage away from everyone and have a smoke
C1) PRESENT
I would choose A if I was so angry that I felt I would say things
that I would regret or did not mean.
I would choose B if I feel stressed because of the situation, meaning I
can deal with it, if I can get past my initial irritable response. (I feel
like I am PMSing all month!)
How is that yall??
www.cognitivequitting.com
May 9th, 2003 at 4:03 pm
Not only normal, but expected … almost manditory.
And do a lot of apologizing.
My understanding is that this emotional ‘instability’ is a result of the
physiological recovery from nicotine addiction. Nicotine mimiced a
neurotransmitter that helped control emotions. Nic also created changes in
the receptors that are the binding sites for that ‘naturally’ produced
neurotransmitter. When we quit, there is as recovery period while those
binding sites recover their ability to ‘work properly’ without nicotine.
During that recovery, our emotional control is ‘iffy’. Kelley, this angry
person you see is NOT the real you, it’s only a transitional you. My
suggestion is talk to your kids. Explain that you aren’t entirely in
control and that if they don’t want to spend the rest of their lives in
their rooms, to cut you a LOT of slack.
A realistic time frame, based on my experience and that of other quitters
I’ve spoken to, is about 4-6 weeks of the anger/rage. Then it will become
less common an occurance but may take up to 6 months till you find it’s no
longer something to watch out for. (Took me 6 months to stop experiencing
the sudden, out of the blue rage. Now I’m just a generally irritable piece
of work but that’s liukely nature and not quit.)
Steve
www.cognitivequitting.com
May 13th, 2003 at 9:49 am
— In CognitiveQuitSmoking@y…, “kelley w southworth” <ksouth@v…
huh?
God, I hope so or I’m in real trouble!
- Cat