Help - My quit buddies are falling off
I know it’s silly but everyday (other groups too) some quit buddies
fail. I’ve done it a million times too, but I’m new to this support
system and when your quit buddies fail it sure makes you feel more
insecure about your quit. I’m still strong but sad.
Why when I post from the site I’m authored as gjmt and when I reply
from my email I’m todora? I dunno.
Gail
Five days, 9 hours, 46 minutes and 38 seconds. 135 cigarettes not
smoked, saving $20.28. Life saved: 11 hours, 15 minutes.
September 19th, 2003 at 1:16 pm
Hi Gail
I know its sad when other people in your support system fall off the
wagon but all I can tell you is that the most important person in
your quit is you.
So you need to look after you but you also need to be aware that
often our ‘addictive stinkin thinkin will tell us that - ‘if they
fail then I will fail too so its not worth the effort at trying’.
Its all to do with negative self talk and we are good at that cos we
don’t want to deal with the ‘discomfort’ that is going on which we
usually deal with by lighting up.
Namaste
Inde
September 20th, 2003 at 6:23 pm
Hi Gail,
I know what you mean about the ‘insecurity’ when our quit buddies fall
by the wayside. We wonder, “Am I next? What happened to them that might
happen to me?” Gail, were you’re quit buddies using a quit method that
had them examining their behavior? Were they looking ahead to situations
and planning how to handle them differently? Were they examining old
beliefs to see if they were still valid or desirable? Were they doing what
you’re doing?
Many of you are finding that you can introduce an element of calm
rational control into situations that never in the past included control on
our part. Many of you are quitting very differently than you ever have
before. And while there may be patches or gums or antidepressants as aids,
this quit is about you running the show.
It takes some time until we get to a point where our repeated experience
allows us to begin to have confidence that we can continue to deal with
whatever life throws at us and not reach for a cigarette. But no matter how
secure we become in our own quits, we will feel badly for those buddies who
slip and fall.
Steve
www.cognitivequitting.com
September 21st, 2003 at 11:15 pm
Back again Indi &Co,
Happy This New Year!
I drop a short comment on this quit buddies thing. When one of my
in-laws started to smoke little cigars - oh yes, he thinks he´s
not
started smoking, because he doesn´t smoke cigarettes any longer -
I
was thinking by myself the reasons why some of us develop certain
“ideas” of how to cheat themselves. Of course I´m sad for him, but
I suppose you are quite right, Indi, all that matters at the first
place is myself. As long as I´m not developing any “ideas” of how
I´m
able to be a sort of quitter, I´m safe.
Let´s take care, all of us!
Ilkka
Finland
September 23rd, 2003 at 5:55 pm
illka
Happy New Year to you - glad to see you are still with us (in more ways than
one)..
Indi