Comments on: Linda’s Introduction

By: hassan_11

hassan_11 — Tue, 18 Nov 2003 04:38:30 +0000

In a message dated 18/01/02 02:12:41 GMT Standard Time,
catmohan@… writes:
Should have known that really Cat but brain fog and halfzeimers are well and
truly setting in.

By: hassan_11

hassan_11 — Mon, 17 Nov 2003 06:53:47 +0000

In a message dated 17/01/02 21:43:17 GMT Standard Time, katie@… writes:
I really don’t think we need to work it all out exactly cos once we know
hermy/warren exists then we can use our foundation statements. At the end of
the day the worse case scenario is that we are going to feel bloody
uncomfortable by not smoking (and this discomfort can be appeased in other
ways lots of the time)
What is the worse case scenario if we continue to smoke????? I know what
mine is - having to face open heart surgery. Well who knows maybe I still
will even though I have quit but at least I am giving my body a fighting
chance to avoid it.
So what do I do - well I choose NOT to smoke, I choose to learn how NOT to
smoke and deal with the associated discomforts of learning this new behaviour
and the ‘normal’ feelings of ’stress’ and other bodily discomforts that we
all have.
There are many issues that I have had to deal with since I quit smoking and I

really would have thought that having got to the third stage of my life I
would have had more brains by now and figured out the obvious - but no.
I have smoked for 44 years and am not sure how many of those years I have
spent trying to quit. Not really trying you understand but subconsciously
probably knowing that it wasn’t good for me and I would prefer to be a
non-smoker.
So for all the times I tried to quit - I would decide to ’stop smoking’ - it
was usually in response to a new ‘quit smoking’ aid which had come on the
market.
So I would buy it (whatever it was) take it, use it and expect it to stop me
smoking and when it didn’t I would reinforce my belief that either it was too
hard for me to quit or really there were some of the cigs I really enjoyed
and they didn’t do that much harm, I have to die from something, its my only
vice and so on and so on.
Now what I was in fact trying to do was appease the discomfort - instantly
and then I would never smoke again!!!!
We all know it doesn’t work this way but I had to try over and over and over
again.
Until now that is, now I’m doing something different and I am getting
different results.
I no longer smoke, I no longer get any discomfort relating to my need for a
nic fix, I no longer have the desire to smoke.
What I do get are all sorts of discomforts relating to living in this mad
world with all these mad people:) and all sorts of discomforts relating to my
body healing from its 44 + years of nicotine/smoke abuse.
I’m going to do a post about these over the weekend so keep you posted.
Anything is doable LindaLou - if you choose to do it!!!!!!!!!!!
Namaste
Indi

By: hassan_11

hassan_11 — Sun, 16 Nov 2003 16:23:58 +0000

In a message dated 17/01/02 23:19:32 GMT Standard Time, ukpam2000@…
writes:
Post a time - late afternoon - about 4 - 5 would suit me
Indi

By: Neva Marjory

Neva Marjory — Sat, 15 Nov 2003 12:14:02 +0000

Human Resources - we used to have a Personnel dept til the term
became ‘old hat’
Pam
PS Just been chatting with Cat - need you two to get me ‘ready’ for
Saturday Spinchat?

By: hassan_11

hassan_11 — Thu, 13 Nov 2003 23:09:46 +0000

In a message dated 17/01/02 18:28:18 GMT Standard Time,
catmohan@… writes:
Can I have a translation please - what is HR????
Ta
Indi

By: Neva Marjory

Neva Marjory — Thu, 13 Nov 2003 02:14:46 +0000

Oh my yes, the stress is intense here. I work at Encyclopaedia
Britannica. We’ve laid off over 2,000 since 1996. But the support
group (remaining employees) is a huge help. If I ever am one of the
layoffs here I am looking forward to being the person who sprays
perfume on you when you walk in to the department store. That is all
the work related motivation I have left.
Thank you for your answer on my ABC’s. I was feeling like a
numbskull at the time.
A matter of interest to show I am doing my homework: When I walked
past our switchboard operator yesterday morning she asked me how I
always managed to be so upbeat and cheerful. By yesterday I knew the
truthful answer. I said “Barb, I’ve learned that it may be because
I’m a smoker. The smoking hides my true feelings”.
Good, huh? I think I’m getting with (some of) the program!

By: Neva Marjory

Neva Marjory — Wed, 12 Nov 2003 18:59:51 +0000

Ugh! You work in HR? The years I worked as a Personnel Assistant
were probably the most stressful as far as work. It can be brutal,
especially when going through layoffs.
- Cat

By: Neva Marjory

Neva Marjory — Sun, 09 Nov 2003 11:15:51 +0000

Hi Linda - me again. Thanks for your email - I’m so glad Sue
suggested you join this group, and its good to hear she’s doing well
with her quit - now at 8 months.
So - have you quit? Or set a date? You were saying how you read
and reread the ABC’s - have you started work yet on looking at some
of your own particular ‘must have a cig’ times, and worked out where
those urges are coming from/what feelings you’re experiencing, and
how you’re going to deal with them? If you don’t feel that
confident about posting your ABC’s here, then do email Steve -
he’ll be glad to talk you through them. Be prepared to have them
gently ‘tweaked’ at first - it doesn’t hurt, honest;) We all lived
to tell the tale and get pretty good at writing/doing them.
Jump in Linda - tell us how its going. Again, it’s great to have
you here with us (and tell that Sue to come back and post and let us
know how she is)

take care
Pam

By: Neva Marjory

Neva Marjory — Tue, 04 Nov 2003 22:32:12 +0000

Hi Linda - a big welcome from me too Glad you’re on board here.
If you’re accessing the group from the website, have a look in the
files section (the link is on the left hand side) and you can look
up past posts e.g. about ABC’s, member introductions, etc as there
are so many posts now in the archives. I’m working on those a
little each day, so keep checking back there.
I quit almost 11 months ago using cognitive quitting, and was very
lucky to have Steve as my quitcoach right from the outset. I am now
very secure in my quit, and truly believe I won’t ever smoke again.
Practice those ABC’s and you really will have a great set of tools
to deal with whatever life throws at you, the events which up to now
have triggered those smoking urges for you.
Reading the posts, and posting, are great, but one to one chat is a
big help too. Do you have ICQ/Messenger, or any other chat
programme? If so, let us know, and we’ll do what we can to support

you. We also meet up in a Chatroom over at Spinchat sometimes, so
look out for posts about that.
So, hope to hear more from you soon,
all the best
Pam

By: Neva Marjory

Neva Marjory — Tue, 04 Nov 2003 15:17:18 +0000

Thanks Cat. I will find the posts related to dreams. I was on a
message board daily at the time I had the dream. Other people who
had dreams were so relieved when they woke up and knew it was just a
dream. I didn’t react the same way. It was a beautiful day and I
was walking downtown smoking. I smelled, tasted and felt the
serenity in my brain. In this case my dream really must have
been “an unfulfilled daytime wish” because I did not quit obsessing
for weeks until I started smoking again. I kept reliving it. I can
see that when I ABC for dreams I need to have a lot of back up plans.
And I plan to. Linda