hi :)
Brenda,
Great foundation statements. Congrats on your first week.
As you continue to think about this quit in logical terms, you’ll find
that you are becoming more able to handle all of your routine triggers.
Given all you have an your plate, even the ‘routine’ may seem pretty
intense. And you’re right, there is no ‘good’ time to quit. Personally, I
think we’re in a better state of mind for quitting when there is upheaval
in our lives. I know that can sound a bit backward, but I find that most of
us experience a shift in perspective when we’re under stress and that shift
can often mean we’re a bit more observant of our own patterns.
As for ABCing routine events …. ‘routine events’ are made up of
routinely experienced sensations. ‘Out of the ordinary’ events are made up
of the same sensations. Often the only difference is in the intensity of
the sensations. So preparing and learning how you’d like to respond to
usual fatigue and boredom and hunger prepares you for extreme cases. The
rational responses are the same, the internal beliefs and statements are
the same, and your foundation remains the same. The only thing that changes
in all this is the degree of intensity.
Continue to do the homework and you will be prepared for whatever comes
at you.
Steve
June 30th, 2004 at 1:40 am
Wishing you (and your daughter) everything good, Brenda!!!!!)
Sounds like you are coping superbly with your quit……….
Jean
June 30th, 2004 at 8:32 pm
Hi Brenda
I also can relate. I felt different almost immediately in this quit in not
thinking about cigarettes 24-7. I attribute that to the newfound
cog-thinking and the residue from the brain implants from quitting over and
over again. This time, I have I had no calls close enough to be called
close calls either. In fact lately, (4 months quit today)I find myself
puzzled to pieces about the entire smoking process and can’t believe I gave
almost 30 years of my life to it. My oldest daughter is 22. Here is how
she smokes: There doesn’t seem to be any enjoyment to this process, she
pulls in a great quantity of smoke, then she inhales but very shallow, then
she blows it all out in one great long breath. I am watching her and I know
you can see the question mark on my forehead. Anyway, that is where I am at
at 4 months.
You should be very proud of yourself in that you realize there is really no
proper time for a quit other than the present. If you make it YAY, if you
don’t you have more brain residue for the next time. I feel confident in
this process and this time.
I have a daughter that is almost 15. I will pray for yours. In the
meantime, read and read the posts and post yourself. Steve said something
recently that hit me as quite bright in that this cog-quitting process,,,
Wait, I wanna get it and quote it so I don’t screw it up. “The exercises I
nag people to do prepare us for the major events by teaching us how to
handle the routine events.” I found this to be true.
Anyway, wanted to address and welcome you. Gotta get back to work. OOOOps,
my bad.
Peg
July 1st, 2004 at 6:20 am
Congrats on 4 months quit, Peg :))
I loved what you said about being ‘puzzled to pieces about the
entire smoking process’. I think that once we’ve examined it as we
do in a cog quit, we see that it simply isn’t a valid response to
anything any more - and we do puzzle how we ever thought it helped
or made anything better. Or how we even thought we enjoyed it.
Pam
— In CognitiveQuitSmoking@y…, “Peg Putzbach” <putzbach@m…
July 1st, 2004 at 4:34 pm
Congrats on the 4 month Bday of your quit Peg. I won’t be at my third month
I’m not very good about writing down my ABC’s (that’s one reason I love when
for a few more weeks.
I’ve just got back from horse camping and took me last nite and this morning
to read all the posts. Thank you to those who do post because I for one find
it encouraging and helpful. It’s great to hear also from the new people and
be reminded that the cravings do taper off and things do get better with each
week that passes.
How are you doing Paulette? I know you were just starting your quit when I
left and you are one of the few west coast posters.
Well, now I can add camping as another new non smoking experience. This time
the only smoke people were dodging was coming from the campfire.
others posting’s of ABC’s because they put into words what I think), The one
thing I try to do is pinpoint events that in the past would cause me to rush
to light up thinking the cig would “calm me down.” Had problems loading one
of the horses, so I’m holding on to the 1000 LB brother of the 1200 LB horse
that is acting like an idiot. After horses safely loaded into trailer, my
first thought wasn’t “I could use a cig” but rather, “A few months ago, I
would feel I needed a cig, WHY?”. I puzzled this out for a few minutes and
then came to the conclusion that for me at least the act of smoking during
stressful times did not “relax” me as much as helped me to avoid problem
solving or just facing up to issues.
I even demonstrated to my equine friends cognitive thinking when I talked to
their Arabian gelding about his destructive behavior when tied to trailer. I
went through a whole series of ABC’s and while the horse may not change his
habits, my friends got a clue about what I was trying to accomplish with my
quit. (But who knows, I may have just discovered a new line of work!)
This is ending up a novel and I just wanted to say hello and to let everyone
know that I read all of your posts and it is a big help.
2+ months and growing! Bobbie
July 4th, 2004 at 6:57 am
Hi Bobbie,
I don’t know much about horses other than that ppl ride them and at some
or is that just a load of horse poo? 
Steve
At 11:25 AM 6/3/2002 EDT, you wrote:
“…. my first thought wasn’t “I could use a cig” but rather, “A few
months ago, I would feel I needed a cig, WHY?”. I puzzled this out for a
few minutes and
then came to the conclusion that …..”
If your first thought was “A few months ago, I would feel I needed a cig,
WHY?”, did “I could use a cig” ever become a thought? I doubt it. You’re
doing ABCs in your head and that’s fantastic. That’s pretty much what we
all do once we’ve gotten a handle on ABCs (here it comes…) and the way to
get a handle on them is to first write them out on the puter or on a tree,
up to you. Seeing it in front of us, the mechanics of typing/writing it all
out, this all comes together to imprint the ABC template on our minds.
Bobbie, you’re doing great if you’ve developed that awareness of how
you’re thinking in the moment. You can use the same format to look at
events that will happen in the future. Think of it as just some more mental
ABCs.
point the tail lifts and out drops horse poo. But I’m guessing that as a
rule, tone of voice, your ‘vibes’ will have an effect in some way on a
horse’s response to you. When we ABC something out loud, there’s a cadence,
there is sureness and simplicity. When an ABC is all laid out, we’re
balanced internally. So I wonder if helping a horse ABC his behavior might
not reap some sort of change?
July 17th, 2004 at 11:59 pm
I think it’s like anything else…it’s so much easier to practice on someone
bobbie
else! Besides it was a good way to let those around me know I need to stop
and think about my responses now instead of just emotionally react to
situations.
ps the horse was brought over to our house to exercise in our arena….he
still needs a little practice with his ABC’s
September 29th, 2004 at 1:38 pm
Apologies for having to leave chat so quickly yesterday without
saying goodbye to people. It just wasn’t a good day, all in all,
and I had to leave to sort a few things out. Sorry.
Janine
September 29th, 2004 at 9:00 pm
Hiya,
Would be good to catch up soon, chat can sort things pretty quick
sometimes.
Still up?
October 2nd, 2004 at 11:46 pm
Hi, Steve,
Was this message to me directly, or to the group? Just asking cause it was
sent on Monday, so I thought it might not be about the Sunday chat…
My personal favorite quote of yours so far, and I believe I”ll tatoo it on my
forehead, is “I never feel as foolish as when I trip over something I already
knew about.”
Have a good day,
Harper
October 3rd, 2004 at 7:01 am
Sorry guys, I meant to send this to Steve privately. He’d helped me in a chat
a couple of weeks ago, and I thought he might’ve been checking in to see how
it was going.
Again, sorry for clogging your mail boxes!
Have a good day,
Harper
October 3rd, 2004 at 11:52 am
It was to me, in response to my post, Harper.
Jan
And thanks for that chat, Steve
October 4th, 2004 at 9:44 am
OK now I’m conused…. which message?
October 4th, 2004 at 4:59 pm
OK now I’m not confused. Glad it helped
June 5th, 2006 at 7:48 am
Steve and I will be in the chatroom on Steve’s site www.cognitivequitting.com
tomorrow. (Click on the ‘chat’ link on the main page) We’ll be there 1pm MST/
4pm EST/ 9pm Brit time. I hope some of the new members will be able to join us,
and get you started on a cognitive quit.
Pam