New to Cogquit: first stab at ABC
Hello,
I am relatively new to the group, but not new to quitting. I am
finally on my last and final quit. It has taken me 8 years to get to
this point. I’ve been quit for a little over 3 months now. I
stumbled onto cognitivequitting.com and decided to try it out. Here
is my first ABC. Let me know what you think.
A. I am at a bar waiting for a friend. My friend is late.
B. I feel uncomfortable just sitting here with no one to talk to. I
could talk to the bartender, but he’s too busy. Everyone around me
is absorbed in conversations. A cigarette always used to make me
feel more comfortable in this type of situation. Sometimes, I would
chainsmoke until my friend shows up. But, I don’t want to smoke any
more.
C. I need something to do. A cigarette would be something to do.
B1. I don’t want to blow my quit on this. It’s not worth it. Plus,
I really, really don’t even want a smoke. I just want to have
something to do so I don’t look stupid sitting here and so the time
will pass until my friend shows up.
C1. I always have my quit smoking diary with me. I will pull that
out of my bag and read some of the entries while I wait. That way I
will be reinforcing my quit as well as passing the time.
C2. Uh oh. This is the one time I don’t have my quit smoking diary
with me. I will mentally try to remember my reasons for quitting.
Then, I will try to remember all of the benefits of quitting. If she
still hasn’t shown, I have my acronym I work on when I’m bored:
smoking is UNSATISFYING. I am finding the best words for
UNSATISFYING. I can try to remember the Smoker’s Vow and all of the
other useful info I learned through my quitting. My friend will
definitely show up before I finish thinking of everything I know
about smoking and quitting smoking.
September 14th, 2004 at 3:58 am
Theresa; great job on that first ABC!!! I do have a suggestion or
two but I could only log on for a minute…I’ll try to get back a
little later on…in the meantime, keep up the great work on that
quit…
- Cat
— In CognitiveQuitSmoking@y…, “terrigiunta” <theresa_giunta@g…
September 15th, 2004 at 1:50 am
Hi Teresa,
Sorry I haven’t gotten this out earlier, sometimes r/l conflicts with
my online time. For a first ABC, I think you’ve done very well. Though if
I may, I’d like to rearrange it just a bit.
Of course, there can be situational smoking associations i.e. in a bar
or with certain friends, but you seemed to suggest that it was your
discomfort at being alone in the bar that was the beginning point of your
cig thoughts. I’d include ‘discomfort’ as part of the event.
A. I am at a bar waiting for a friend. My friend is late. I feel
uncomfortable just sitting here with no one to talk to.
Then, B contains ALL the thinking, including any and all response options.
B. “I could talk to the bartender, but he’s too busy. Everyone around me
is absorbed in conversations. A cigarette always used to make me
feel more comfortable in this type of situation. … (but) I really,
really don’t even want a smoke. I just want to have something to do….
(and a couple of relevant options)
I always have my quit smoking diary with me. I will pull that out of my
bag and read some of the entries while I wait. That way I will be
reinforcing my quit as well as passing the time.
(which is great until…)
Uh oh. This is the one time I don’t have my quit smoking diary with me….
(which, as it turns out, makes no difference since there is a mother lode
of info to be mined from this situation i.e. ‘what do I feel physically in
this situation?’ (you would be currently experiencing the answer), ‘what
other situations have these feelings?’ (general awareness of your patterns
of behavior), ‘how can I address what I feel in a controlled nonsmoking
way?’ (you’re creating appropriate responses that will be portable to other
situations that have similar feelings.)
C. is action. It’s the response(s) you’ve chosen and are ready to implement.
One thing to remember when doing abc’s is keep them as simple as you can,
almost outline form. Teresa, I hope you’ll try another soon. Maybe for
some routine daily events (after meals, starting the day, driving)?
Hope to hear from you soon,
Steve
ps- I haven’t heard of the “Smokers Vow”, what is it?
September 16th, 2004 at 6:49 am
I agree with Pam. There is no way we can foresee the sort of events that
might rock a quit. But we know that the physical sensations thet accompany
those events are the same as the physical sensations of less ‘critical’
events, just not as intense. I think what we’re really doing with cognitive
quitting is learning how to respond to what we feel rather than the event
that percipitated the feelings. Work on how you want to respond to what
you know you will feel in a crisis situation and the rest will follow.
Teresa, as long as you choose to stay aware of how you are responding, I
think you’ll do fine.
Steve