Comments on: 16 hours

By: Neva Marjory

Neva Marjory — Fri, 08 Oct 2004 19:20:47 +0000

….It wasn’t, but it’s now in the Files section under ‘physical
sensations’
Pam

By: Raleigh Missy

Raleigh Missy — Thu, 07 Oct 2004 07:13:40 +0000

… I think. Actually, I’m pretty sure this was posted before. It may
even be in the files section and I’m ashamed to say that I don’t know if it
is. Anyway…. yesterday I was chatting to someone and asked them to
begin to make a list of reasons they smoked. The list was to include the
feelings that went with each particular reason to smoke. Sometimes people
are a bit unsure about just what it is they’re really looking for when we
say describe a feeling. I’m in the process of collecting material that’s
scattered all over my HD and came across the following which includes my
initial posts and a wonderful reply by Becky:
In an effort to answer the question “Describe what you feel?”, I’m trying
to come up with some tiny exercises that illustrate ‘feelings’ in terms of
physical sensations. These are not intended to create long term awareness
or even awareness through a whole day. Their sole purpose is to create
instant awareness of a particular sensation so that we may learn what to
focus on when ‘describing how we feel’.

Put a rubber band around your wrist. Snap it. What does that feel like?
Does it sting? Does it pinch? Describe the sensation.
Place a hand flat on the table. With two fingers of your other hand, push
down on the back of the hand that’s on the table. Push fairly hard.
Describe the sensation. Describe what the two fingers that are pushing feel.
At a steady pace, go up and down a flight of stairs twice without stopping
(or once if twice would be too much). Describe what you are feeling,
describe what you are doing i.e. breathing, heart rate.
Hold an ice cube in your hand. Notice the first sensations of cold. do you
feel it getting colder? Does the cold sensation change to one more like
pain? Describe the feeling of cold as it goes from cold to pain. Can you
hold it longer and feel the pain turn back to cold? Do you feel the cold
up into your wrist? That sensation of cold…. describe it.
If you’re not sure you understand what describing a physical sensation is
about, go back to the rubber band and snap it HARDER. Describe that.
If any of you can think of some more little routines to focus awareness
on a physical sensation, please add them.
Becky wrote:
I’ve had some experience with therapy and this is what the therapists are
always trying to do, get folks “in touch” with their feelings. And yes, I’m
talking about the physical ones.
When I was first in therapy I had no idea what anger felt like physically.
I would think it and act it out but not just feel it. And that was the
problem. So that’s what we specifically worked on, finding my anger. I
finally felt it one night, like warmly oozing out of my arms. Others feel
it like hot eyes or seeing red: the physical manifestations of anger.
Sadness is usually a heaviness in the chest. (That’s what I felt most of.)
Fear is constriction of the chest, throat. Stomachs sometimes feel tight or
heavy.
Anyway, after the therapy was finished (about 8 weeks) I felt so good that
I told the therapist I could almost quit smoking. (lol) I could * feel * my
feelings! But I think with me I’ve usually smoked the feelings away. Every time I get
a physical feeling I smoke it out. I suppose (I hope) that they will come
back when I get quit of the smoking. I hope I can identify them so that I
will deal with hunger by eating instead of smoking. Thirst with drinking
water. Maybe if I can get really aware again I can feel them prior to
quitting and respond to them intelligently (cognitively?).
Right now I just feel tingly all over my hands and feet (natch). I feel a
little full from eating a banana. And I’m very tired. A bit of a headache
from being on-line so much already today.
The lack of vocabulary to identify the feelings is part of the problem and
the only reason I lack the vocabulary is because I haven’t really used it
before. I never did understand “hot” as a descriptor for angry.
becky

By: Neva Marjory

Neva Marjory — Wed, 06 Oct 2004 23:51:19 +0000

Hi Ellen - it was good to read your post and hear your perspective.
I think this is something a lot of us can relate to. I remember
reading someone’s post some months ago (not on this list) about ‘the
real me’, and what you said reminded me of that. I don’t think we
change as such, rather we discover things about ourselves that were
always there, but were suppressed for years: it was so much easier
for years to stuff our feelings with a smoke, instead of recognising
what was really happening to us physically/emotionally, and treat it
accordingly.
It’s a great journey - I commented to Steve when we were chatting
yesterday that, at almost 18 months quit, this really has been a
dream come true for me: I like the ‘me’ person I’ve found, that used
to lurk behind the smoke screen thanks for posting that.
Pam

— In CognitiveQuitSmoking@y…, eslyttle@a… wrote:
…… I don’t post much here, but I am reading everything, and have
gone back &

By: pilar60

pilar60 — Sat, 02 Oct 2004 13:31:16 +0000

Hi, John,
Harper here … we exchanged a couple of messages a while back. I’m set to
quit again on September 15, and have been in the planning stages with
foundation statements and ABCs. You did not discourage me. On the contrary,
your messages have been encouraging!
Keep it up.
–Harper
In a message dated 8/5/2002 10:17:27 PM Central Daylight Time, dmwjcw@…
writes:

By: dorothea_10

dorothea_10 — Fri, 01 Oct 2004 17:34:45 +0000

John,
You should be really proud of holding your own. Since my quit on July 1st, I
have found the biggest trigger to be fights with my husband. I have also
found, that as I conquer this addiction, other parts of my life are changing.
I am not as tolerant of things that are hurtful or harmful. I don’t put up
with as much bull (*#$*&~! from family or co workers. I am becoming a more
confident & assertive person.
I don’t post much here, but I am reading everything, and have gone back &
read some older posts. This change I am seeing in myself is not unusual.
You can see it in other quitters posts too. It is an amazing thing.
After mourning for a terrible, harmful, addictive substance, I am finding a
stronger, more mature, more dependable person inside of myself. I can’t wait
to see who I finally become as I continue to grow out of this addiction.
So, my point is, keep it up. You will be astounded at who has been hiding
behind the smoke for all those years. I know I was.

Good luck.
Ellen

By: Neva Marjory

Neva Marjory — Fri, 01 Oct 2004 13:22:57 +0000

I hope I have not been so negitive about my own situation that I have
discourged any of you out there, My intention was to let all the
quiters know that even in the most stressful situations you can still
use the ABC’s to not only help you from smokeing but in other life
circumstances. I know that posting on this site has surly helped me
to get a perspective thanks to those who replyed and this is what it
is all about, Helping each other and shareing our experiences and
figuring out how to apply the ABC’s to getting through this most
horrible addiction. It only took one reply to my call for help to
make me understand that I had many more choices than I had origanaly
thought. No matter how bad you feel there is always an alternitive to
smoking that deadly weed. The ABC’s do work so to all of you , I am
working them and so I hope you will too. It is the only way to give
up an addiction but is the way to deal with life. Steve started
something big here and this ABC thing really works if you work it. I

have been 14 days into a quit and did not give my ABC’s enough thought
and now into 18 hours because I did not practice my ABC’s Do it and
it will work. Sorry I got a little carried away but I do believe.
Lets all just make it and keep practing the ABC’s. OK I am done.