#$%^^$$%^^&##@
Damnit!
I have fought this all fricking day! I have a DH ( you can use your imagination
here) who undermines me every time I quit. I am sick of fighting the cigs and
him. I have a son who has lost his job two months ago, took a month off not
looking for work, I guess he was on some kind of holiday. He has moved home.
Same sone, only son is named in a paternity case. He is working temporary/part
time, bums money from me and his dad, to have gas money to work…..I am
soooooooo pissed.
I know, I know…
A. I feel like know one gives a %^%#% whether I quit smoking or not. God
forbid, I could be alittle bit bitchy without smokes. I am depressed (sonny boy
will probably never move out), DH is acting like a shit ass. I am totally
stressed and on the verge of smoking. Son wants money for gas and cigarettes,
he is broke, blah, blah blah. Husband cant stand on his own two feet and deal
with our son, he sends him into me to deal with.
B. I could smoke…I would feel better for just and instant. If I do, I will
be so pissed off at myself I wont be able to see straight. I am sick of
fighting …. it is all I can do not to go out and buy a pack of cigarettes. I
know I would be mad at myself, I could just take a drive, I could just go to
bed, I could just scream! I want a cigarette, that is the only thing that is
logical, that will make me feel better.
C. I am hanging on by a thread, because I know I will be pissed if I smoke.
Hell, I am already pissed! I know this has to be detox. It is really hard. I
know if I can get through this, I will really be glad, I know this craving will
go away….I know that smoking will not change any of the problems that I have
mentioned.
I cant seem to come up with a good reason not to smoke….I know I cant ….
just give into this. I wish I had some form of support here at home.
November 29th, 2004 at 1:57 pm
Hi Julie,
Everything you’re dealing with there comes under the heading of extreme
stress. Stress and nicotine withrawal are almost identical sensations. So
in that situation, wanting to smoke in order to relieve the discomfort is
an automatic association. The catch is, and you realize this, that a
cigarette isn’t going to change the facts of your son being there and your
DH not standing with you. As long as those facts exist, you are going to
feel the physical sensations you are feeling and they will always feel like
those of withdrawal.
I can see two ways to approach this. One is deal with the stress at the
sources (son and DH) or deal with the sensations of the stress. Dealing
with the stress at the source is a long term issue and won’t provide any
sort of immediate relief. Dealing with the sensations of the stress is
something you can do immediately.
I wish I could offer more,
Steve