Anger felt… (once again)
(sort of grouped and in no particular order)
fast flash of hot heat to my face
forehead feels warm
stomach tightens up
a churning stomach
butterflies in the stomach
a tightening of my lower back
‘tight’ all over, abdomen, chest, shoulders
twitching of the jaw muscles
legs ready to jump, arms ready to strike out
shaking and cold hands
trembling hands
teeth start a death clench
clenched jaw
rapid heart beat
rapid and shallow breathing
faster breathing
dry throat
prickling feeling at the back of the neck
thoughts are faster than you can speak them.
red flag going right up, faster then anything I can actually see in the
process
This is a wonderful beginning. Now, what appropriate responses do we
have to deal with these ’sensations’ of anger?
Steve
March 30th, 2005 at 3:41 am
Hi there,
You folks came up with a fairly impressive list of physical sensations
that accompany the experience of anger. And your list nonsmoking response
options was 1- breath, 2- walk (around, away), 3- hot bath. I know
breathing is a great way to get oxygen in and energize the muscles and
brain, but is that going to deal with tense muscles? I need more than just
breathing as an option if I’m going to respond differently to the physical
sensations.
Help me out here…..
Other than breathe what can be done? Can anything be done or is this
a situation were awareness of the source of the sensations is enough to
know a cig isn’t the proper response?
well we’re already breathing. it’s just that the breathing isn’t
‘normal’ relaxed breathing. what can be done?
drink water.
btw, if anyone isn’t sure about how to stretch, there is a fantastic book
called ‘Stretching’ by Bob Anderson.
Warren
March 30th, 2005 at 9:14 am
Steve,
We all believe that certain feelings and sensations are bad ( like
the feeling we get when we can’t smoke) and we spend our life running
away from these feelings or refusing to face them in the mistaken
belief that we can’t bear the pain.
When you give up smoking, again and again you will get that strong
feeling which simply translates itself as : ‘I want a cigarette.’
But this time when you give up smoking you are going to do the
unthinkable: you are going to welcome these feelings, these
sensations in your body, no matter how often they come.
You are not going to run away from them or try and take your mind off
them. You are not going to cross your fingers and hope and pray that
they will go away.
You are not going to fight them, suppress them, fear them or resist
them in any way. You are not going to substitute something else for
the cigarette like extra food.
You are simply going to allow them to be and stay with them as they
present themselves in the moment and simply observe them - like a
scientist observing an experiment.
And it is this simple non-judgmental observation - this simple ‘non-
doing’ that transforms all your old heavy painful feelings into their
essence - pure energy.
April 1st, 2005 at 7:20 pm
Hi Ian,
A question…. the source of this quote found on your site?
“You learned how to smoke; and now you will have to learn not to smoke!”
also, from a post of yours on about.com:
“You are at the last stage of killing the big monster inside your head.
Just remember the stronger the craving the louder the monster is shouting
because he is dying, not getting better, you may think that you are doing
something wrong for the cravings to be so bad but you are winning, it is on
it’s last legs and will soon be dead forever, do not fight it let it die”
Which “big monster” would that be?
Steve
April 4th, 2005 at 7:42 pm
Steve,
You wrote <A question…. the source of this quote found on your
site? “You learned how to smoke; and now you will have to learn not
to smoke!”
Not quit sure if it is a quote. I am studying for Diploma in Smoking
Cessation Therapy and have read a lot of material along the way. Why
is it yours ?
The Big Monster I refer to is used as a visualisation tool for people
who have not grasped the concept of feelings being just that,
feelings, For them to see something dieing has a bigger impact on
what they are doing as most people will see an increase in the power
of the cravings as they get further into there quit. To see it as
something they are doing right is hard for some people to work out,
they think that if the urges are stronger they are failing in what
they are doing.
Hope this anwers your questions.
Thanks
Ian Clark