Hey Y’all !!!!!
Hey everyone…I haven’t posted in a long time, probably a month or two
(or more, maybe?). I don’t have time to read through all the posts as
in the past. Well, maybe I should say I don’t have the focus to read
through all the posts. I was thinking about that this morning.
Focus.
I work for a large (well, it used to be much larger) telecommunications
company. So far, I’m one of the ’survivors’ - i.e., I still have my
job. I’m an Administrative Assistant (Admin) and, from what I’ve been
given to understand, most people who have worked with me think I do a
pretty damn good job because I can multitask like the dickens. The
truth? Even though I’m energetic and (try to be) enthusiastic, I have
trouble focussing on one task for more than a short while, so I go back
and forth, skipping around from problem to issue to mindless drivel to
challenge to… well, you know what I mean.
What does this have to do with a quit?
I just want to stress how important it was to MAKE myself focus on what
is being said here about appropriate responses, ABC’s, Warren, your
physical signs, etc. etc. etc. I can’t remember when I have ever
made myself focus on something like I did with this cognitive thinking
as it pertains to quitting the smokes. I did my lists, I wrote out
lots of ABC’s (a lot of them are posted in the archives here), I
rollercoastered my way through those first few weeks, then learned how
to handle those rough spots the next few months. I gave up my nights
out with friends, stopped drinking for a while, didn’t socialize as
much. I bugged Steve and Pam for months, making them tell me again and
again (what can I say, fuzzbrain was real for me) that the lesson is to
learn the appropriate responses to my life’s events.
Looking back, I wonder how in the world I kept my job, it seems like I
was constantly thinking about how to respond to each little urge, how
to anticipate each trigger. And my family… well, I’ve always had a
hot temper and I still do. But I’ve learned to redirect those quick
responses most of the time. When I started to whine that my husband
was starting to question why I was on the computer so much, Steve gave
me some very simple but important advice… ‘talk to him.’ Hmmm, now
there’s a concept. I found I was trying so hard to focus on this
quitting method that my DH was starting to feel abandoned/left out. So
I started telling him about this method of quitting. Now, you have to
understand, my husband is the type that just never understood why I
didn’t ‘just quit.’ He was one of those rare individuals who did just
that 20 years ago. He decided he wasn’t going to smoke anymore and
quit. AND, get this, he STILL will smoke a cig or two once every month
or so when having a beer or twelve. Anyway, I started to talk to him
about everything I was going through and he actually listened to me for
a while. Once he’d decided that I was on a legitimate path to better
my health and lifestyle, he patted me on the head and said that’s good,
go for it, don’t let me hold you back :-). So I guess what I’m trying
to get across here is that I would love to see everyone here on the
cogquitting site concentrate and work on the exercises, but remember to
talk to your family or whoever is in your life who may notice your
absence, not only physically but also mentally.
Back to focus - ha! See what I mean? I get off-track so easily. Now,
if you thought that was bad, I have to admit that I started this post
almost a month ago and am just now getting back to it. See what I
mean? During this past month, though, I barely even thought of
smoking. I think the only time I think of it is when I notice others
smoking which isn’t often anymore either.
I remember that when I made the decision to quit for the last time, I
also decided that I wasn’t going to go through years of thinking about
a smoke like I did when I quit for 2.5 years 18 years ago. I ran
across the cogquit site, did my homework, talked (and ranted) to Steve,
Pam, Pat, and with many others that were on this site at the time.
So, do your work, practice practice practice, and a cogquit will
happen.
- Cat (smokefree for 16+ months)
PS- Did I miss a special 2 year anniversary??? Congrats, Pam!!!
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“If you’re smoking after sex, then you’re doing it too fast.” - Woody
Allen